by Skye the Sheltie 🐾
Humans, I would like to propose an idea.
You spend weeks wrapping presents. Paper. Ribbon. Bows. All of it is very crinkly and exciting and tragically, inedible.
This feels inefficient.
I suggest edible gift wrap.
Let me explain.
First, wrapping paper exists for exactly three seconds. Humans tear it off, throw it away, and then spend the rest of the day saying, “Wow, that’s a lot of trash.” This problem could be solved with cookies (preferably from skyebiscuit.com).
Imagine:
Gingerbread wrapping
Fruit-leather ribbon
Biscuit tags with names pressed into them
No trash. Only joy.
Second, edible wrap reduces stress. Humans get tense about making things look perfect. But if the paper is a cookie, crooked edges are rustic. Burnt corner? “Artisanal.” Broken bow? “Snacking opportunity.”
Third-and this is important-dogs can help.
A present wrapped in edible materials invites teamwork. I could assist by:
Inspecting edges for safety
Removing excess wrapping (efficiently)
Preventing leftovers from going stale
This is called collaboration.
Also, edible wrap solves the problem of “Who gets the box?” Because there would be no box. Just immediate gratification and fewer arguments.
I know what you’re thinking: “Skye, some foods aren’t safe for dogs.”
Correct. That is why dogs should be involved in the planning stage. I am available for consultation.
In conclusion:
Less waste
More snacks
Happier humans
Extremely fulfilled dogs
If Christmas is about peace on earth, then edible gift wrap is clearly the next logical step.
Thank you for your consideration.
I will be waiting near the kitchen.
Love,
Skye 🎁🐶